"And oh how it unchains my daily torment!"
About three months ago, a combination of events,
prolonged issues and unsettling pressure coupled with perceived expectations
began to create excess anxiety and depression, which inevitable
took grasp within me. The result was a
full force meltdown. It was during this
time when I withdrew from Facebook as well as from my passions, interests,
people - well practically just about everything. I will explain more in detail at a later
time, but had to share what is giving me peace during this turbulent experience. There is a place and time when nothing
matters, where I feel comfort and pure joy.
I don't have to go far, just my back patio. The time frame is perfect and limited, just
at the moment when the sun says goodbye to the day. A couple of nights ago I captured the picture above. Within seconds inspiration and creativity took hold as the words spilled
out uncontrollably from the heart expressing how this therapy that God grants
us every night (weather permitting) brings hope to my weary and stressed
being. How many of you have a special
place or time that is all your own, when you feel at liberty to just be, to
become yourself with no restraints, demands, expectations and pressures? Where and when is your moment to be free?
So many people do not understand that adult
Aspies can suffer from meltdowns and looping, that we can shut down for an
undetermined amount of time lasting a few hours, days or even several
months. And people will never even realize that the looping and shut down is happening right in front of them especially for female Aspies because we keep that mask on nice and tight.
